Abuse in the workplace

by — May 4, 2002 (Comments)

Abuse in the workplace appears to be rampant. Respect is on the wane. People in their 30s are taking over the workplace situation as they should. However, they are using high school tactics to resolve their problems and soothe their inflated egos instead of growing up and utilizing patience and understanding when people are or act different and accepting that difference.

One of the main attractions in high school was to be in a group and to get somebody who was different from the group. Either freeze them out, or retaliate for a wrong or perceived wrong. Who decided what was wrong? Was it wrong for that person, or wrong in the group’s eyes? In which case there was no tolerance for differences. We grew up and became part of the real world, we realized that there were any number of people and idiosyncrasies that we had to accept and deal with. We may not like it, but it was important for getting along and working together as a team in order to make the world go around without constant bickering and intolerant attitudes. Or do you know someone who continued that high school mentality?

Not everyone has been taught team effort in high school. Sports are no longer offered in most schools today. Not only did it teach coordination, a healthy physical outlet, but how to get along with each other in a team effort no matter what. Choosing a team member that was terrible in sports is no different then a coworker who doesn’t perform, you learn to deal with it. Without team sports, people are unable to understand team effort and patience in the work force. They revert back to trying to get rid of that member instead of accepting their faults and realizing their abilities.

Each one of us has a life that deals us blows that we need to work out. We do not need to deal with people who freeze you out, make you stumble (you do enough of that on your own), disrespect you, and treat you with an attitude. We all need to work together for the good of not only the work place, but for the good of each other. A team spirit is essential in today’s workplace.

No one walks in another’s shoes. Therefore, they cannot possibly understand the whys and wherefores of someone’s complicated life and their reactions to it. Judgments should not be made by an individual’s own rules, but by patience and cooperation in understanding another individuals rights and place in their world. Bringing someone else down for your own ego, perceived slights or hatred is not acceptable. Children who have not yet learned values or morals do this. Grow up, get over it and get on with it.

Perceived slights are a biggie. One’s misunderstandings can lead to someone else’s downfall (perpetuated by you or your group) and that can throw that individual into loss of self-esteem, income and perception of their own capabilities. Why would anyone want to do that to someone else? You cannot build yourself up by tearing others down. What have you gained? If there is a problem, try to guide them, talk to them, but don’t stick a knife in their back.

Tearing others apart is a negative that has consequences that go beyond a single action another individual can do to them.

We spend most of our time in the workplace rather than in our home life. This gives us very little time to solve life’s big and little problems but to have strife in the workplace and struggle with both issues is unfortunate and unnecessary.

If you know someone who has that problem (solving their own weaknesses by hurting someone else) do you support it? Do you partake in it? Do you just turn your head? What does this do to your own self-esteem when you know someone may lose their job over your actions because someone else led the way? Do you really see the problem or do you listen to the person who is on a mission of destroying someone else? There is always an underlying interest that the destroyer has that is not necessarily the truth or it may be the truth, as they see it.